Longing for Life's Easy Button

After I went to my last OB appointment 2 weeks ago, I was a little discouraged after being diagnosed with gestational diabetes.  The reality is that millions of women have gestational diabetes, and that alone wasn’t really what bothered me.  It was more the combination of everything.  I wondered why it seemed like there couldn’t be one thing that was easy.  The very next day a sweet new friend that has been through a similar situation with her child just happened to send me a message.  She shared with me a portion of a devotional book about Exodus 3:4-8 where God was speaking to Moses at the burning bush.  God said, “I have seen the affliction of my people, I have heard their prayers, surely I will heal them.”  She went on to say that God calls us to do things because a job needs to be done and that he does not call us to do the small, easy, or trivial but instead the seemingly impossible.  This entire message came to me at such a perfect time because I kept saying why can’t things just be easy, and how ironic that one of the exact words she used was “easy.”  Just so you know, she had no idea that I had a doctor’s appointment or anything new was even going on.  The timing of that was perfect because it was God’s timing.

The day after we learned about Hudson’s heart I was sitting in the doctor’s office waiting to go back for my amniocentesis.  As Jamey and I were waiting, a family that had just found out they were having a little girl sat down beside us.  As the couple’s other child was on the phone sharing the good news with family, I couldn’t help but get choked up when he said that the baby was 20 weeks (exactly Hudson’s age at the time) and that her heart was perfect.  I actually had to leave the waiting room because the emotions of finding out about Hudson were still so raw.  Jamey came outside to comfort me and as we were sitting on a bench together he said do you remember that apostle in the Bible that had an easy life with no challenges.  I told him no and he said that’s because there wasn’t one.  God uses people with extraordinary challenges and impossible situations.

We all have struggles and challenges in our lives and it's normal to wish there was an easy button to push for those times.  But that is when God truly teaches us what faith is.  It is easy to have faith when you are on a mountain, but the place where faith can really grow is in the valleys of life.  God promises us that he won’t give us more than we can handle, but that doesn’t mean things will always be easy.  The lesson that God is teaching me is that the most difficult things in life are usually the most beautiful.  I know that every moment with Hudson will be such a blessing.  Maybe I would have taken things for granted otherwise.  I wonder if the sleepless nights, dirty diapers, and crying would have eventually seemed frustrating before.  I can tell you that it will not now.  I will cherish every sleepless night with this amazing gift from God.  Every milestone Hudson reaches will be a victory, and I can’t wait to spend my life loving him.

Happy Easter

28 weeks

I heard this song from Group 1 Crew the other day and it really touched me so I wanted to share!